be careful what you wish for … in the claws of the Leviathan?

Since I admitted that my biggest drive is curiosity  and that implies also to push the envelope I can definitely say that this is an experience I didn’t have had yet – nor would I have chosen to have it.

I have to say that it should be considered in advance that I am a strong believer and defender of our liberal system. As always, only empiricism can teach one differently. And of course my recent experiences are only minor ones  and barely give a taste of how it could be  but still …

Going through a so called MPU (medical-psychological examination) gave me an inside of how it is to be pretty much handed over to a system with totalitarian character and more so … being thought of as guilty before having the ability to defend oneself. Don’t get me wrong – I was and am guilty of the incident and to be honest – getting caught sucked but was just and I deserved it.

But being exposed to a certain way of a psychological interpretation that leaves no room for anything that doesn’t fit into it showed two things clearly: One is being submitted to such a totalitarian way of thinking. The second I can only compare to the famed institution called inquisition (though without doubt on a much smaller scale.) Maybe we can put it this way: the interhuman quality is the same but with the inquisition we are dealing with a much much ….. greater quantity of the same thing, meaning that the principle behind it stays the same: To get out of it you have to plead guilty. (Like I said we are not talking about the incident.) Not submitting to an injust system meaning here – you definitely loose. Can justice really base on something like this? If the “positive right” does then I am truly doubting the functioning of the system. Maybe the state then really is the “great beast” (as Simone Weil would put it) meaning that even the so called liberal state has a totalitarian quality about it that should not be  tolerated. Ok  maybe  I have been naive that way. I hate certain people saying: I told you so The way the psychologist was proceeding strongly reminded me of a critic  Alain and after him Simone Weil had worked out: The problem with psychology is that they are setting where they want to get in the end first and then find a way to get there. In this totalitarian system of world interpretation there is no room for individual change but only for therapy. One is wondering why the mental problems seem to be getting more and more in a society where everything is supposed be be solved  by therapy so we can all function well.

Well I am not going into details here … that would be boring and can be read everywhere anyway. The problem is: Does our liberal democratic system really have to base on  such things? Because then the free individual which is actually responsible for its actions is only a disturbing factor. But isn’t that what a liberal democracy with all its institutions should protect?

I have to admit that for me it was also somehow a test for how far can we trust this system  … And trust me I know how pathetic and declamatory it sounds. But that doesn’t mean that there is some truth in it 

 I know it is just a minor thing. So its is even more amazing for me how much it strained and shook me mentally. Maybe I am just a wimp. But this being robbed of ones dignity by being pressed into this system of interpretation  and not being able to to anything against it showed me again how far I am still away from becoming a second Socrates or Diogenes And by the end of the day being pressed into any kind of a system where somebody takes over the sovereignty of interpretation does  exactly that: By not acknowledging the persons own sovereignty of interpretation as a space no one  has a right to occupy and thus robbing the indiviual of this freedom to interpret and change oneself (and such taking true responsibility for ones ideas, values and actions) it becomes a subject totally integrated into another system and such loosing all acceptance as a person himself, so depriving human nature of its most underlying right.

And so again the old saying becomes very true (as those old sayings very often do ) Be carful what you wish for – it could be that you get it. And my limits are set a lot narrower then I thought.