Half way there to 70 ….
Friday, 2011-August-19
“What then is time? If no one asks me I know what it is. If I wish to explain it to the one who asks, I do not know”
(Augustine, Confessions, Book XI)
Funny thing, time … not wonder the philosophers have always thought about it.
I remember well how a. gave me the blog to my 30th birthday. For some reason also the day itself stands out very clearly in my memory. It was a good day spend in the company of good friends. So much has changed in the meantime. I have the feeling if I would look only a little bit closer I could actually “see” or feel the passing of time. Makes one a little pensive and melancholic though not exactly sad. Also the awareness sharpens more and more that the time for a mind set that lives for the future, the “One day I will … this is how my life should be” is passed – this is exactly how my life is, here and now unfolding …
Funny, I think one of the most important things I learned in these years is to be grateful for the good times and the people who made them so … tinged with regret that sometimes I didn’t “pay” them back very good and the hope that they know how much it means to me to have had them in my life …
And so of course Rilke comes to mind:
Erinnerung
Und du wartest, erwartest das Eine,
das dein Leben unendlich vermehrt;
das Mächtige, Ungemeine,
das Erwachen der Steine,
Tiefen, dir zugekehrt.
Es dämmern im Bücherständer
die Bände in Gold und Braun;
und du denkst an durchfahrene Länder,
an Bilder, an die Gewänder
wiederverlorener Fraun.
Und da weißt du auf einmal: das war es.
Du erhebst dich, und vor dir steht
eines vergangenen Jahres
Angst und Gestalt und Gebet.
(Aus: Das Buch der Bilder)
